31st March 2014 11:11AM

Dearest,

Yesterday marked my 2 years of membership in Australia and dad's birthday.

Today I have strong connection when I'm chanting to Gohonzon.
I vowed to have a life long kosen-rufu partner. Found this article from one of the blog by Jamie Silver Lee whom one of the member find it useful to make a set of determination for kosen-rufu partner.
The last bottom page which has a empty space to sign and write date. I decided to give it a go and written today date.

I pray to create value with my partner to make every land a Buddha Land. With respect and love, bring forth our buddhahood with love and compassion to shine through all people who are struggling in their love relationship.

I have been struggling for more than two weeks, feeling suffer and sorrow. Lacking of appreciation how my partner treated me. I love him completely and accepted the way he is which he wanted me from the very beginning; vice versus, it end up I pray he could accept me completely for who I am now. I am complaining. The behaviour and attitude have completely changed and swap between two of us. Lacking of treasure. Losing attractions and attentions. These are all the pain karma I have created in the past towards him and now in returns he did the same back to me. I must eradicate karmic retribution with Nam Myoho Renge Kyo.

He didn't message me anymore whenever he got up in the morning, of course I am upset. He is getting away and far away from me. I believe I have fulfilled my mission to encourage him to actively participate in activities. Now, perhaps is the time to move on? I can feel, the true feelings is not there from him anymore. Perhaps is just because busy with other things? I don't know. Doubts? YES. Chant? YES. Study? YES. Practice. YES. Someone told me to stop feeding love because it will stop someone to treasuring and appreciating while too much on it.
I ask Gohonzon, how can I improve this relationship? With wisdom, courage and compassion.
How can I strengthen the bond between us? Nam Myoho Renge Kyo. Nam Myoho Renge Kyo. Nam Myoho Renge Kyo.

I just want to tell the whole world, I still love you very much. My attention is all still you.

xoxo